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So did you guys notice this ad today?

I had to read it twice to understand that it was all serious.

And it was asking us, the paying retail consumers, to say thank you to the retail employees, when we go to shop.

Now I am all for dignity of labour and have nothing in particular against retail employees, but at this rate, next they will have a “PSU Bank Karmachari Diwas” and an “Excise Department Staff Day”, and we’ll have to say thank you and give gifts to them too.

I mean, it is a different thing to have a Doctor’s Day or something like that, but a Retail Employees’ Day, where we, the consumers, need to give them more respect and thank them, is a bit far fetched.. !

I appreciate the few examples given there – a Chotu who delivers tea with a smile, or the Tambi giving you nice steamed idli.

BUT…

a. These are the equivalent of kirana retailers, who perhaps have a stronger sense of customer service,

b. Also examples are often from the hospitality end of retail, rather than the product stores, and

MOST IMPORTANTLY,

c. The real association behind this, is of organized retail. The last place in India that you’d associate with good, friendly service!!

Because we do not have a Nordstrom in India just yet. And until then, without much exception amongst the other retailer brands, what we get is indifference, incompetence, gossipy check out counter clerks who are least interested in you, the customer, and the like.

Yes, I am generalizing to a large extent, but that is because, this is the general experience we have at stores in India!!

I appreciate the motives of TRRAIN, which I hope, include providing better training and getting retail employees to a better level, overall. But that process may have just started. As the process starts, you cannot jump in and demand that respect, on day one!! There’s a long way to go.

I am not clear what the objectives of this campaign are. If these are to show the employees, that TRRAIN is doing something for them, and letting the world know that as employers, they care, that is fine. Then, it is an internal HR exercise, and the outside customers don’t really matter.

If however, it was actually meant for the outside customers to feel like they have been enjoying favors for which they need to be grateful, then they’ve got it all wrong!

EARN THE RESPECT first..

Improve the service levels. Get the real smile on the retail employees’ faces. Let them be really helpful to the customer – not by exception, but by rule. It’s a long way to go. DO all that, and THEN come back to the consumer. And ask for our respect. We will be happy to say ‘Thank you’ and a lot more!

 

Here’s an uncharacteristic (for me) Short review of The Dirty Picture: certainly brings alive the Silk Smitha days, Vidya Balan’s got an awesome role for herself and she does well (like she did in Ishqiya), certainly there’s a lot of oomph, story could have had some more depth (post interval, story meanders), awesome dialogs right through. Works reasonably well overall, because as the movie itself says, it’s all about Entertainment, Entertainment, Entertainment. Story no matter! One thing that intrigues me though: a lot of (80’s style, landline) telephone dialing is shown. And the phones connect each time. On first attempt. No.. that wasn’t how it was, in the 80s, was it?? 🙂

P.S.: I could have used another (bolder) image here, but I am not about to use Silk to ‘sell my blog’.. lol.

 

Mausam is veteran actor Pankaj Kapur’s first directorial venture. 

He has delivered some great work as an actor, on television as well as on cinema. And as per perception, he does appear to be a ‘thinking’ actor. As would be the wont for a serious thespian of his kind, over the years, he may have had a lot of ideas, on the kind of cinema that he’d like to make. If he got a chance..

And then he got that chance. With Mausam.

And he went ahead and put all those ideas into the one and same film! Perhaps not being sure if he’d get a second chance (after seeing Mausam, I do have doubts – maybe he should just stick to acting).

And so we have Mausam where the story moves from and covers:

– Incidents like 1992 Babri Masjid riots, 1993 Mumbai blasts, 1999 Kargil war, 2001 US 9/11 incident, and 2002 Gujarat riots,

– Locations from small town Punjab, to Mumbai, to Scotland, to Switzerland, to Ahmedabad.

All of these are not mentioned in passing, but have a place in the narrative.

You’d think that packing so much into a feature film would make the film a fast paced one, right?

Surprise, surprise!! With so much that Pankaj Kapur covers, he still manages to play the story in crawl mode. Ultra slow..

Yes, the story seems to not be going anywhere often. So sitting in the theatre, I check my mail on the phone, I put out some tweets, check Facebook etc., even as the story is unfolding (well, “not” unfolding in fact…!) on the screen in front of me!

Some of you may want to stop here, if all you wanted was a verdict. Yes, its a clear no-no.

But for what it’s worth, let me share a few more thoughts on the film:

– I love the visuals in the film. Then I look at the credits. And I am not surprised. Binod Pradhan’s an absolute master cinematographer. And he’s done a brilliant job here too. From the visuals of Punjab (the best of the lot) to Scotland and the cement pipes, the camera and the lights have worked their magic.

– Small-town Punjab has been captured well. The prosperity on the one hand, the humor (the ‘musical chairs’ scene is funny), the global connections, the characters like the taangewala, the youth and their options in life, the girl besotted by the handsome neighbor, etc. capture the early 1990s’ Punjab well. We also discover how Atlas Cycles and others have built their fortunes!

– It is also interesting to understand how, in this modern world, in a single lifetime, a person could go through so much. Aayat (Sonam Kapoor) is born and brought up in her early years, in Srinagar. She gets uprooted from there and sent to small town Punjab, for a while. From there to Mumbai, then to Scotland, back to small town Punjab, then again to Scotland, to the US, and then, to Ahmedabad. And by this time, she’s still about 25-26 or so. Wonder what else she has coming up, in her life. While this does not happen to everyone, it is not something that is unbelievable either. This is the kind of world that we live in. Amazing, isn’t it? The kind of extreme swings that life can give, and how one has to keep adopting today.. very interesting!

– I guess it takes an experienced and successful Aditya Chopra or a Raju Hirani to follow their  gut, and stay close to the conviction that they have, about their narrative. All other filmmakers are subject to tremendous insecurity and fear of failure, due to which reason, they include ‘elements’ that are not really connected to the story, but which have commercial appeal. Is that the reason for introducing Scotland / Switzerland in Mausam, for example? Could those locations equally have been Mumbai or Bangalore, otherwise? Why not? But a) the visual appeal of those locations, and b) the Scottish and Swiss Tourism Boards bankrolling some dollars in return for the “product placement” would have found attraction. The dance item a the end of the movie also, had no relevance, but added to appeal to the Shahid fans. You never saw such gimmicks in good films of yore, and directors narrated their stories, and that was it!

– I am sure girls swoon for Shahid, and he looks good, and uniforms do create a special appeal. However, other than some smart dancing (I rank Shahid only next to Hrithik in terms of dancing abilities, on Indian screen today) and cute smiles, there is nothing great about his acting here. There are scenes where he literally acts poor and in others, he is average. Perhaps his father, the director, has also not given him any special histrionics, which could have been a distinct possibility, given that he was the central character, and on screen, perhaps for more than 80% of the time! Rakesh Roshan drew out much better juice from his son’s talent pool, than Pankaj manages to do here.

– Sonam Kapoor has to look pretty, hum a few “haanji / naji” kind of dialogs, giggle a bit, etc. She does all of that. Along with the Kashmiri carpets and the Atlas cycles, she’s part of the furniture on the sets! Her height actually makes her look ungainly in many scenes. Dressed in the typical loose fitting Punjabi salwar kameez, as a student earlier, and and also in the last scene, as a married mother, she looks very funny. I think they have purposely not taken too many side-by-side standing scenes of Sonam and Shahid. Else she’d come out looking taller than him. She does give a perception of being taller, which Shahid obviously has a small frame. Not a great pair, in that sense..

– I did not quite see the relevance of the title, ‘Mausam’. Of course, it is a passage of time. But most stories are. What might have been a better title is “Taalen”. The story if anything, is a story of locked doors!! If you see the film, you will know what I mean… 🙂

In summary:

1. Amol Palekar did a terrible job as director of Paheli. Pankaj Kapur falls in the same trap now, with Mausam. Great actors, who when they have got their opportunity to direct a mainstream Hindi cinema with a largish budget, lose their original sensibilities of film making, and go overboard, trying to pack too many things. Also depend a lot on the main sellable actor (Shah Rukh in Paheli, and Shahid here). And end up making a dud. Mausam is a box office cropper. Pankaj will have a tough time finding backers for a second venture.

2. Shahid Kapoor is capable of more and has shown us too. He needs to put more into his work, and choose scripts that suit him better. His overall frame does not make him a convincing senior Air Force officer, no matter he thrown in a moustache there. Walking around inspecting the aircraft makes him look like a mechanic of the aircraft rather than an ace pilot!

3. Sonam Kapoor. Well, she’s fine. She’s not a fantastic actress, so she’s good to be in the glam face on screen kind of roles, make some money, have a good life. Yeah, she’s fine!!

It hurt more as the cinema had raised the ticket prices to 270/-. Was not worth the money. Hope the mausam changes and we get better cinema in coming weeks.. !!

There are some very interesting aspects of the Anna Hazare movement, in the context of modern India. I add to the tons of material on the subject, with my 2 cents of thought, as below:

1. Modern India is shining:

A party may have lost an election on the India Shining tag line, but we cannot deny the fact that India’s doing well, economically, and the general standard of living has gone up, across the board. People have work, people are busy, people are making money.

So how does that impact this movement?

Well, ordinarily if you are doing good, you have less reasons to complain.

And yet, we have HUGE mobilization of people, from across all sections of society. Reason is that the economic growth has happened IN SPITE of this corrupt government, and not because of it. And as one more mega scam gets exposed after another, there is a sense of detest amongst the people. That with all things going well for us, why is there this pain point in life? And due to which reason, people are protesting.

But at the same time, it is this prosperity that makes the few “intellectuals” give their deep analysis and keep finding the little loop hole here and there. If India was not shining and life was tougher, even these so-called nay sayers would have joined hands in the protest. But sitting pretty, they can afford to do their analysis paralysis!

2. Modern India has Social Media:

Again, this has had dual impact.

The huge mobilization has happened with help of mainstream media, but also because of social media. In fact, mainstream media almost “had” to fall in line. The tendency of our media brands, and especially the English television kind, is to look down upon anything that is even remotely looking like right-wing. This was not. But still the tendency of the media was to keep pointing the “other” side of the story. When they sensed the groundswell, on ground as well as on Social Media, the media vehicles had to fall in line with the popular point of view.

On the other hand, Social Media also makes it easy for the “experts” sitting at home, in front of a PC (or whatever device) to pick the holes. And put out blogs and Facebook updates and what not. NONE of them has given ANY practical solution that I have read so far, but all claim to find issues in the present movement. Luckily, this one time, the groundswell opinion has drowned out the voices of these naysayers, and the movement continues to generate momentum.

3. Modern India is Young:

Not just in this movement, but in society in general, I find people on the other side of 40, being resigned to India’s “fate”, as it may be. I am also on that other side of 40, and there have been times (though rare – I try to find positive things in life, in general) when I have also felt a similar resignation of sorts. But these people I talk about, usually think in terms of ‘politicians will always be like this’, ‘corruption is the way of life’, and stuff of that kind.

These are also the people who felt many years back that we’ll just have to wait 5 years to get a car allotted, or phones will die in monsoons, or that we’ll always have to go with a begging bowl to the IMF.

Well, some things have changed. And others MIGHT. Who knows?

The modern India is young. It has not seen the license raj, except in a film like Guru. For them, it is a piece of fiction. And they are the Jaago Re generation. They don’t take shit. They want things their way. So while the smaller problems they deal with themselves, and get change to happen, when it comes to larger issues like nationwide corruption, they did not know how to bring about change. But in an old man Hazare, they have found a connect. Which is where you see the mass following from the youth, from college students, even from school students. They want the country of their dreams, and this man offers them a hope to get there. And they are willing to follow (Few days back, a lady was sharing the story – someone asked her teenage daughter who her ‘ideal’ was, and instead of the likes of Dhoni or Aamir Khan or an Anand Mahindra, she chose her grandfather; the youth today respect a person, irrespective of age!).

4. Modern India THINKS: 

This is not to say that we did not have thinkers earlier. But in a less connected, less literate, far more rural India of yore, personalities were bigger. The aura of Mrs. G worked just because it was Mrs. G.

Today every Indian has an opinion of his own. Equipped with knowledge and enabled with technology, opinions are shared and can convert to mass thoughts. Personalities will be rejected if they are not convincing in their thoughts. The reputation of journalists is as good as the stand he / she takes, and how well it resonates with the people’s opinions. A Barkha Dutt was soundly rejected when she made her plea in the Radia tapes case. In spite of her reputation. Same goes with a Rajdeep or an Arnab or a Shobha De.

Which also means that there are hundreds of views on a movement of this nature. Whether the approach is right, whether he should blackmail the government, whether the new proposal of the Lokpal bill are adequate, whether there are better ways to making the impact, etc.

The fact is that the issue is not trivial. If you ask for solutions to get World Peace, you think it will be a one-liner that everyone agrees upon? The current problem is not much different in complexity. And which is why, there will be many opinions, on parts or all of the solutions proposed. Also whatever Anna Hazare and his team have proposed is not perfect nor is it a panacea.

So IN SPITE of these holes being found in the proposals, IN SPITE of people not agreeing on everything, the movement has taken shape and has gained momentum. Because he is at least DOING something. And the thinking modern India agrees that while it is not perfect, it is a move in the right direction. It will hopefully stop the southward movement of governing value system, and will give a hope for a bigger change to emerge in time to come. Also as they say in Indian mythology, the current government pot of sins has grossly overflown, and people DEMAND a stop to this.

That is the view of modern India, and which is why it has wholeheartedly supported the movement. In spite of a few differing points of view. Also of course, due to the fact that Anna’s team has been very conscious of getting it right. They have made sure that there is no connection to parties, the people in the forefront are pretty ‘clean’ and in spite of Manish Tewari’s histrionics, there is little to find obvious and apparent fault with. Unlike say, in case of the Baba Ramdev attempt.

We could be witnessing history in the making. The turnaround of the nation. With everything else going for it, as a country, we are also resisting the corruption bugbear! Wow.. I am so excited. If we win this, can ANYTHING stop us as a country, then??

What do you think? I, for one, am in support of Anna Hazare. Salute the man, salute the movement.

It’s become fashionable to find faults in a film and protest till the film has to cut scenes (no matter what that does to the story) or have the producer apologize or pay-up! It appears that every other film generates some such reaction, from some part of our country.

Can anyone stop and think that the film is “fiction” after all?! That its a story line, and in a story, you can have positive and negative characters, and positive and negative emotions as well..

Why is it that people freak out, and take all films and film stories so sensitively?

What if this becomes a trend, and extends beyond objections to “Bombay” or about reservations, or about Karnataka…? What if ordinary people also get sensitive to the portrayals on screens?

Imagine the possibilities:

….

1. The ladies outside the theatre were shouting loud slogans. When the TV reporter put a mike in front of them, the leader said, “how can they have such scenes in the film? It is a complete insult to all of us. What will the world think of us?”

As she said these, the other women started shouting in chorus. “Yes, yes, this film must be banned. Down with the film.. ”

After a lot of the sloganeering, finally the reporter was able to get the actual, final reason for the protest, from the leader…

“We hear that there are scenes in the film where a mother-in-law is shown mistreating the daughter-in-law. It so damages the reputation of all mothers-in-law. Seeing the film, no daughter-in-law will like to maintain relations with the m-i-l. In fact, they will take the son and walk away to stay separate. This film is having such dangerous connotations. We cannot allow this. They have to cut those scenes, change the story line, or we will not allow this screening… ”

2. The scene outside Rahul Cinema was very strange. It appeared as if all the black marketeer ticket sellers were gathered outside the cinema, and were selling tickets only at this one theatre.

But wait, they were not really selling tickets.

The tight T-shirts, handkerchief bandana wielding “bhais” also had some posters and banners in their hands. In their typical language, they had the messages out “Is philum ko aapun nahi chalne dega, kya?!” and “Saala, ye philum laga to usko khalllas kar dega, samjha kya..?”

The petite TV reporter looked like a midget in between the bhais. But she managed to get her question in, amidst the loud shouting of “down with the film” that they were doing.

She said, “sir, but why are you asking for the film to be pulled down?”

Bhai: “ae taklya, ye kya bol rayli hai re? usko samjha, ye koi inglis gherao nahi hai. Bhai ke saath bambaiya baat karne ka, kya?!”

She gets it. And attempts “Sir.. ye film aap kyo rukvana chahte ho?”

Bhai: “Rokego hi na, saala.. apun ki bhi koi ijjat hai.. ”

He continues: “Is philum me bhai logo ko comediyan jaisa bataya hai.. kya hum log itne ch**iye hai kya? Isko dekhne ke baad public aapun se daregi thodi? Mazak karegi aapunka.. ye pikchar ko to hum bandh karvake hi rahenge.. koi bhi is pikchar ko dekhne jaayega to usko hum khullas kar denge..!”

And scenarios of this kind.

What do you think? What will be the next protest?

It’s a little late. But I was thinking I could still protest against Rocket Singh Salesman. As a marketer, it was little insulting.. Maybe I can block the home video release? What say?

  • After a very long time, we went for a movie on Sunday afternoon, and did not find tickets. Not in one theatre, but in two of them, in fact. Ultimately had to get tickets for a later show. That gave me the first indication that this may yet be something special!
  • And indeed, Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara (ZNMD) turned out to be a fun-filled, refreshing, enjoyable fare, amongst the best releases of the year so far.

  • First let’s get the comparisons with Dil Chahata Hai, out of the way. Yes, DCH was also a Farhan Akhtar film, though he had directed the same. Here it is his production, but his sister is the one who’s directing it. Could the siblings think so alike? Could their creative talents be so similar? Well, maybe. Why not? OR.. Farhan did have a hand in shaping this film , beyond being an actor and a producer?
  • So the resemblance to DCH is uncanny. Its a film about three dudes on a pre-wedding, last bachelor trip (in DCH, they were a little younger and marriage had not crossed their minds just then). To that extent, there’s a shade of Hangover also. So it’s similar to that extent, and yet its different in many ways.
  • I would still rate DCH a notch higher, more from the point of view of it being an iconic film, having just that little extra meat in the story, and the characters of all three protagonists being developed a shade deeper, and all of them going through some turmoil. And hence the story being that much more meaningful.
  • In ZNMD on the other hand, what we have is largely a slice of life. Rest of the mental anguish and other factors, are relatively superficial. The hunt for Dad or ‘is it the right time or person for marriage’ are relatively lesser issues, than what the characters grappled with, in DCH.
  • That apart, ZNMD is still a lot of fun, with a new kind of genre that I discovered recently, namely called “bromancing”. An interesting concept around male bonding, without elements of homosexuality.
  • So this is a bulleted review, rather a few bullets of my thoughts about the film. Here are things that I liked most..
  • I’m in love with Spain. Would so love to do the road trip these guys took. Certainly goes into my travel wish-list. (Travel destination companies – if you have something to flaunt, get folks like Ritesh Sidhwani and Farhan Akhtar interested to make a movie there, and you will not need to do any other form of marketing!)
  • Abhay Deol is not quite the stupid, funny simpleton that Saif was in DCH. But he is the quiet and cooler one of the three, for sure. But he shows he can act. After Sunny, he may yet be the Deol to carry the family name ahead. I also did not realize he was that tall. Or at least they make him appear to be tall enough!
  • We all know that Hrithik is the best dancer around, and all he needs to do is “Just Dance”. And I had heard that Farhan can shake a leg too. But was surprised again, to see Abhay Deol match them step for step. Good fun dance moves, over some decent Spanish style foot tapping music.
  • The philosophical aspects of the story are there. The quest to do some dangerous adventure sports, as per an old college pact, and the resultant overcoming of one’s biggest insecurities, is the underlying message. Works well. Fun to see on screen, the adventure sports are a great backdrop in all respects.
  • Farhan Akhtar has written the dialogues for the film too. And there is a snappiness in them. Quite like the cool conversation that dudes would have these days. And in the dialogues, and on screen, you can see that Farhan has an amazing sense of timing. Is that his guilt that holds him back, even as Hrithik (in the early part of the film) takes jibes at him? Perhaps. You can see him getting a little angry and then stopping short.
  • I don’t know about Kalki. Really, what is it about her that people see? She’s pretty ordinary looking, okay as an actor. So yes, she is just so-so.
  • Katrina on the other hand, is a surprise package here.

  • First of all, the intrigue that one may have felt on seeing the drop of mango drink, Slice, on the sensuous lips of Katrina Kaif, has now been demystified. For Hrithik and the audience. 🙂
  • Second of all, Katrina shows that she can act well. She has a good role and she does total justice to it, and I mean way beyond that one kiss.
  • Of course, the film is a lot about Hrithik. Another power packed performance by the perfectionist. Well, they talk about Aamir Khan being the best in the business today. I think they are not giving enough credit then, to Hrithik. He also picks his projects well, and then packs a punch. This one is another fabulous work of his!
  • And finally, I think the piece-de-resistance of the film is its climax. The bull-racing scene. From daring to do that kind of scene, to the emotions that the actors show before and during the run, the fabulous picturization, what it means in life to all of them, it is truly pulsating. It is the kind of finish that leaves you grasping for more, as you get out of your seats and walk out of the cinema house. Totally brilliant.
All in all, Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara is a great flick to see. Highly recommended. And just for the locales, the scenes, and that last scene, see it on big screen. A TV will just not do justice to it. And it looks even better from up-close, like we did from row 2. LOL.. thanks to the film playing to a packed house!!

First things first.

Mom, if you are reading this, and since you wanted to know my thoughts on the film, to decide whether to watch the film or not, here’s the simple answer. You will not like it. There is no interval in the film, but you may walk out of the film, midway through it, anyway. Mainly on account of the constant flow of expletives, both in Hindi and in English!

Then again, you may not want to be in some agency offices either, and you may like to walk into some of the meetings in our office also, only after prior warning!!

Yes, so where Delhi Belly “shows” that reality, Buddha Hoga Tera Baap chooses to “beep-beep” it instead. Anyway, that’s a different story, and enough about BHTB already!

Coming back to Delhi Belly, their tagline is “Shit Happens”. And yes, there is a character who suffers from diarrhea all through the movie, and besides the language in the film, we are also subjected to viewing this “crap”!

That apart, this slice-of-life flick is fast paced, funny and contemporary. Very today!

3 bachelors surviving in a dungeon like flat in Delhi, doing jugaad to make life a little better, having girl friends, have their lives turned upside down. By accident. And they don’t even know what hit them, when one of them is strung to the ceiling with a tie around his neck!

And then follows the chase and their survival strategies!

The movie is originally made in English, with some spattering of Hindi. It has also been released in a full-Hindi version. Don’t know if it is just dubbed in Hindi. I saw the Hinglish one..

To that extent, it does appear to be a metro, multiplex audience targeted movie, then.

There is no interval too. And I thought, multiplexes did not really make money running, fully A/C theatre screens, to often, sparse audiences. It was the expensive popcorn and samosas that really made money for multiplexes. So how can they accept a movie without an interval. Would drop snacks purchases by at least 70%, if not more??!

So obviously, the society has got a lot more open and accepting of what were taboos, till sometime back. Heavy usage of four letter words, including the desi BCs-MCs, are par for course. Sex and heavy smooches, casual talk of homosexuality, are all also quite acceptable in this day and age now. Yes, they would shock many, still. Which is why I asked my Mom to not bother to waste her money. But for a lot of today’s society, these are acceptable facts of life. So there.

The acting is good. Imran excels. So do his two pals, and Vijay Raaz is special, as he always is. The women are also competent, and in spite of the short film, all characters are developed quite well. Aamir Khan’s special appearance at the end, for an item number, is kind of an icing to the cake.

So long as you don’t get shocked by the use of expletives, go watch it. Should be fun.

And all this talk about not watching with your family etc. is exaggerated. There isn’t much here, that you don’t see in a Hollywood flick that you could be watching together at home, or even on some of the sitcoms.. I watched the film with wife and daughter! And all of us enjoyed it. Except the wife was disgusted by all the shit that happened. On screen. Literally.. 🙂

This post is fundamentally about the film, Buddha Hoga Tera Baap, which I happened to see today. But it has brought up a couple of analogies.

While seeing BHTB, I saw the trailer of Gandhi and Hitler. Interesting juxtaposition of two leaders, who lived around the same time. Both extremely ambitious for their own countries, but both having totally different approaches. This week also saw, in Wimbledon, one of the earliest exits for Federer. One who had ruled these courts for long, one for whom grass was like second nature. And yet he crashed out, after being 2 sets to nil, up!

I am a die-hard fan, and I do not like to see this. I wish he’d just retire, before suffering more embarrassment. I mean, he has toyed with these guys in the past. He has won convincingly. He has RULED. Why make the fans see such pain?

And that is the exact thought I have for Amitabh Bacchan too, after seeing Buddha Hoga Tera Baap.

The man who gave us Deewar and Amar Akbar Anthony and Namak Halaal and Silsila and Trishul and scores of fantastic hits, why oh why does he need to try so damn hard, to make stupid stuff like Buddha Hoga Tera Baap.

It is one thing where a film maker wants to serenade an old veteran and give him a lot of space. But let him take a good script at least, to start with. I mean, roles like Black and Paa (I have not seen the latter, only heard about it) are what an admiring director can do, for Amitabh, if he wants to. Why make him (and the audience) go through stuff like BHTB??

So what’s wrong with BHTB??

1. There is no semblance of a story line. In fact, the so-called story line is so wafer thin, that if you blow a little air into it, it cracks!

2. I think the director is not clear till the end, if he wants to do a gangsta flick, a revenge drama, a comedy, or what. In the end, instead of taking a decision, he lets it all be, and makes a bhel puri of it, that is totally messed up.

3. So fine, it is an Amitabh movie. Must that mean, that veterans like Hema Malini and Raveena Tandon, not to speak of the other two babes, must be shown as wall decorations in the film? Raveena’s treated like a joker, and Hema Malini has such a tiny role, with no room to emote. And she does that well. In the very few scenes that she has, she comes out looking lost. Like she’s wondering,”what am I doing here?”!

4. So Amitabh gets tones of footage. He’s probably in 80% of the scenes. It is a role that is kind of similar to his role in Bunty aur Babli. But there was some story there, and the character had a style. Here, the director has tried to give him style by dressing him up gaudily. One can pardon that, but he looks like he’s trying too hard. And that is not good. The effort shows, where he’d normally look effortless in his films. And in spite of the best of efforts to hide his age, there are scenes, where he actually looks old! Yeah, an actual buddha..!

5. There are too many unanswered questions. The director does not bother about these. LIke how did Amitabh know about the underworld threat to the ACP, while being in Paris. Like, what is the Godman connection? Like the I Hate Luv Stories angle of the marriage bureau guy. What’s that for? And things of such kind.

If you have not seen BHTB, I’d recommend that you save your precious time and money, and give it a skip.

I hope Delhi Belly is better fare..

And I repeat, I’d rather remember Federer for his smooth and flawless tennis, than for his early losses in Slams, to many people, at this point.

Likewise, I’d rather remember Amitabh as the Jai of Sholay, as Vijay Dinanath Chavan, as Anthony Gonzalves, etc. rather than remember him for stupidity like Buddha Hoga Tera Baap.. !

With all the admiration that we have for Mukesh Ambani, it is clear that the learning cycle for a large B2B conglomerate (with all of its legacies) getting into a B2C retail business, is huge.

Yes, Mukesh turned it around in Reliance Telecom those days when he managed it, and he has admitted that he made mistakes there, and he will make mistakes in retail as well. But he will learn.

So here’s my humble attempt to showcase one such mistake.

Waiting at a traffic signal last evening, I saw this store at the corner there, with the store board showing this logo:

And for a moment, I wondered what it was about.

Well, I am a little more interested in the retail vertical, and have kept an eye on Reliance’s efforts, so it came to me quickly. That this was Reliance Retail’s jewelry store brand.

But looking at a logo like this, one could easily wonder if this was a petrol pump, or a telecom store, or some office of India’s largest corporation, or perhaps the entrance to the new residence of Mukesh Ambani?!

No seriously, WHAT IS THIS?? The old style (and boring, for a retail brand) logo of Reliance, and then a running hand, “Jewels” written below it. It appears like the logo design had got totally missed out, and the night before the store was to open, they realized it. And some intern in Reliance Retail, went to Adobe Photoshop, and put this together. Right?!

When you are in the business of petroleum to plastics, and whatever scores of other businesses that Reliance is into (and I refer only the Mukesh Ambani group here), do you HAVE to put the Reliance logo, in all your retail brands too? NOBODY does this.. you don’t have an Aditya Birla More, or a Tata Croma? While you do have a Wal-mart and Sam’s Club, these are not Walton Wal-Mart and Walton Sam’s Club, for God’s sake! Even if they were, in case of Wal-mart, there is still some justification, for a pure retail conglomerate that it is.

But when Reliance if fundamentally associated with plastics and petroleum, pushing that name and logo, in front of it’s retail names, is doing the retail brands a great disservice.

And yet, he may still get away with a Reliance Fresh, but Reliance Jewels? That too, written in the way shown above? It’s a disaster!!

Jewelry trade has on the one hand, the traditional family jeweler brands, like the Tribhovandas Bhimji Jewelers or Popley’s Jewelers, for example. And then there are new-age, smart sounding brands like Gili or Geetanjali Jewelers or an Anmol. Reliance Jewels does not fit in either of the two styles.

If it needed to take on the family jeweler style, perhaps Dhirubhai Ambani Jewelers or a Mukesh Ambani Jewelers, might have been the road to go (would not have worked – this is just to drive home a point!), but the better idea would have been to christen the stores, with some new-age, smart branding. And put a tagline at the bottom, if you must, saying that it is a Reliance Retail venture.

And do the same for the other formats too. Why carry the baggage, and restricted branding that the word and logo or Reliance forces?? Let it go. Create a new name, a new brand altogether.

And this perhaps, is one of the reasons why Reliance Retail has not taken off. It starts from this kind of basics! And if this is so apparent, there may be other challenges inside the organization, as old B2B style working methods may also be forced on, to a retail organization, that needs to operate very differently. The branding imposition perhaps is a visible symptom of a larger challenge inside??

Many years back, as a kid, I remember the Gujarati magazine, Chitralekha, coming home. And my parents enjoying the column, “Duniya na Undha Chashma’. The antics of Jetha and Tapuda and Bapuji were hilarious, and though I did not read much Gujarati, through Mom and Dad, I had got a good feel of it.

Years later, it was interesting to see the same stories converted into a Hindi television sitcom, in the form of Tarak Mehta Ka Oolta Chashmah. When it hit the air, I had my doubts. Whether a story set in the 70s could be adapted well, to current times. Whether today’s folks will find it to be of interest.

But as time has proven, this serial remains one of the most popular comedies on TV, and has been running successfully, for a few years now!

What is it’s magic? Why does it work so well?

Interestingly, at a time when saas-bahus, and Sheilas and Munnis dominate the entertainment space, this sitcom is as far away from those, as chalk is to cheese.

So does it provide the right balance of the Sheilas and the Munnis? Perhaps so.

But other then that, this story of a society in suburban Mumbai, filled with middle class families, has many elements that work well.

There are stereotypical community families. The traditional Maharashtrians, the Sikh and Parsi couple, South Indian-Bangali couple, and of course, the Gujjus!! Folks see a little of their own selves as such.

All of the characters have been developed well, and all get their space under the sun. It is not about just the protagonists. In fact, the entire cast is central to the story and the episodes.

The episodes pack a decent dose of innocent humour, generate sympathy for Jethabhai, laughter at the stupidity and audacity of Daya, and the antics of the kids and the voice of wisdom from Bapuji.

They celebrate, they have fights – which get sorted out soon, there are elements of love, there is the occasional tension.. pretty much a story of “all in a day’s life”.

Looks simple and innocent. On paper, it would not necessarily be predictable to be such a success. But all of these small elements have got together, to make a potent package. And day after day, there is an interesting episode that they manage to put together.

And in these days of slapstick humor, the episodes also put in a small message of wisdom. Which the character of Tarak Mehta himself conveys at the end of each episode.

Really interesting formula for success. I am happy to see such a combination work, in these days and times.

Cheers to Tarak Mehta Ka Oolta Chashmah.. may there be more of these kinds on Indian television..